This would be far more amusing if I was excluded

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This would be much more enjoyable if every person who walked past me last night didn't feel the need to point out I wear my sunglasses at night. That song has been stuck in my head longer than cassettes last in the Bentley.

A small albeit annoying price to pay for the amusement that is to be gained from the rest of the populace. You should all be glad. Lying is simply sinful. Enjoy your reprieve from it while you can because when you go back to it you're mine again.

Take this opportunity to go tell every blank-faced bugger you know exactly how you feel about them. Their rage at being told off just gets me closer to commendations.